okay, so there was no all-nighter tonight. and everything got extended to next week. thanksgiving weekend has officially started, but why am i not looking forward to it? homework time, ya'll!!!

i'm still feeling like crap. being tired is a given because we're now at the final stretch of the quarter. end of 9th week, baby!!! you gotta love it when you know it's almost over, but at the same time you kinda wish it wouldn't end yet because of homework overload. then again, winter break is two and a half weeks away, and i can't wait. it's a much deserved break.

back to my crappy feeling. i'm stressed out, and i don't know why. i guess it doesn't show much, so i wear my blue chuck taylors to show it. but i don't think people know that so i'll just tell them if they ask why my shoes have little holes. the reason why i'm stressed out is because of the thing i recently wrote about. i guess what's disturbing me the most is the fact that i got a box of condoms for my birthday, and now they're stashed in my closet and im hoping nobody finds them. it started out as a joke. it was cool at first, but now it doesn't feel right anymore. this guy who gave them to me took a couple from the box and said, "just in case you forget to bring them the next time we hang out." and so now every time we talk, he always tells me, "we better use your present." i know it shouldn't be a big deal, but i just can't help but think about it. i'm actually being asked (or told, whichever way you want to interpret it) by this guy to sleep with him.

what the hell am i getting myself in to? i seriously didn't think it would go this far, and now i really want out. he's a nice friend to have, but i know i'll lose him once i get out of this friends with benefits relationship. we can never go back to being regular friends like before, so if i get out (and i want to), we might not even talk to each other ever again. it'll be a sad moment, but i think his proposal is quite indecent. all i have to do now is convince myself that it'll be okay to lose him because it's not really worth the stress.