it kills me every time someone does or wants to do something nice for me. i always feel like one day they'll want something in return, and i'm afraid i might not be able to pay them back. i know my assumptions are wrong, but my heart still breaks when i receive favors from people. it could be as simple as getting free food or being told "everything's gonna be okay" when things aren't okay, and i'd still die a little. it usually takes some time to finally kick in, but when it does, i almost always want to cry. i don't know why, but that's how i feel.