it's half past midnight, and i just finished crying.

i was watching A Walk to Remember (i know, a little on the cheesy side), and that movie never fails to make me cry. i've seen it so many times, but i still cry every time.

i think the reason why it makes me sad so much is because it sort of makes me question what my purpose in life is and how everything will turn out in the future. i wonder if i'll ever find somebody that i'll care so much about, just like how that guy cares about that girl. or if somebody would ever care about me like that. i wonder if somebody would ever care about me and make my dreams come true. or maybe it's all just this thing, severely romanticized so people wouldn't lose hope and keep holding on to some kind of fantasy that all their dreams will eventually come true, because even if they can't do it on their own, a special person will simply present himself/herself, take your hand, both of you will walk through life as you go down your list of goals/ambitions/dreams and making them all come true.

i wonder if it'll ever happen to me. i want to think about the people who matter the most to me, but i feel like i shouldn't. i get sadder when i think about people.

i want to sleep. i'm not even going to proof read any of this. i hope i won't start crying again.